Airport shot

It doesn't show well, but in the background is the watch tower for nantucket airport. It's a small place. There were a few cessnas and then our little jet that had 10 people on it. The airport worker collected us at the bottom of the stairs of the plane and then walked us to the building. I wish i'd taken a photo of their baggage collection area. Basically it was a wall of windows - i'm guessing they take your luggage and pass it throught the window thing to let it rest on a metal shelf - much like the moving metal collection areas at real airports, but this one didn't move. anyway, the whole place was cute. Since I walked to my brother's from the airport I thought I should get a photo of the place - I remembered right as I left the parking lot. It wasn't a terribly long walk - maybe an hour is all. Too bad it began to rain about half way through. It's nt sunny here - the whole place is grayish.

Freezing wait

It's raining in ny. We have a 2 hour delay before take off. I think i'll nap. Just wanted to report I resisited chocolate - I remembered I had shortbread cookies in my bag. Yum! By the way - i've been freezing since I woke up. Why is ny so cold? I blame the rain.

Food

I'm surrounded by the most delicious food options: dunkin donuts, sushi, starbucks, sbarro's, wendy's, etc. And i'm stuck eating celery, an orange, and some pizza muffins that came from the depths of my freezer. Call me cheap. What i'm really craving, though, is a package of m&m's. Not sure why. Was it the four hour nap I had on the plane? I didn't even feel take-off I was so sound asleep. Now to kill two hours without succumbing to the lure of fast food and chocolate.

Mystery solved

Ever wonder where the airport stores their wide selection of wheelchairs? Well, I found them. They're at the furthest end of the last arm of the airport - you know - for convenience or something. I'm waiting to board my midnight flight to nantucket. I can't wait to put in the earplugs and take the benadryl. It was a long full day and not as perfectly satisfying as the weekend was.

Lasagna leftovers

Today I made lasagna for dinner. I'm headed out of town tomorrow (hooray for summer break!) and knew I didn't want leftovers so I invited some old friends over. It was a great evening and i'm glad I did it. I like cooking and I like sharing my creations. You all might remember a time I made pizza and shared it with cindy and marsha. Do you remember that cindy? Remember how I couldn't figure out why the cheese wasn't melting? Upon closer inspection we discovered that I had been fooled into thinking the bag of hashbrowns in the freezer looked exceptionally similar to a bag of frozen mozarella. Well the frozen white food product fooled me again! My lasagna was perfect in every way except that the pound of mozarella turned out to be a pound of hashbrowns. and just like the pizza incident it wasn't all bad. The tomato flavor was a bit strong and it seemed a bit dry, but this was all that was left of the 9x13 pan after 6 people ate. Everyone was exceptionally kind about it and we enjoyed laughing about it. I'm just glad I had the good family type friends over instead of the new kinds you want to impress. It was a great evening and I have some yummy lunch for tomorrow.

parenting

so i often find myself reading articles about autism. every now and then i worry that my fascination is an omen that i'll wind up being the parent to an autistic child. the odds seem pretty high - i'm no mathematician but the fact that i read about it a lot makes my odds high in my head. anyway, i was reading an article today - it was an old one from the ny times that i printed off and am finally getting around to. a quote in there fascinated me in terms of parenting in general.

"i treat everything the child does as having a reason - to feel calmer, for example, or to feel excited," dr. greenspan told me. "often the parents have notions of what the child should be doing, so they're trying to control the child rather than build on the child's natural interests."

so what do you think of that quote? good stuff, no? i want to be the sort of parent/teacher/adult that doesn't control but insteads facilitates. (that was the best word i could come up with for what it sounds like he's describing.)

consequences

so, if you leave your car window open by accident over night you risk having things stolen - like your car. or, as in my case, you just run the risk of having rain get in there. yep, it was a heavy rain storm last night and my window was open. who knew? well, luckily i have leather seats so just the floor mat really appeared wet.

in other news... i saw a boy, who i know for a fact has a heart condition, walking around holding a 2 liter bottle of mountain dew. can that be good for him? the soda this generation is consuming boggles my mind.

end of year humor

one of my fellow english teachers passed this around to the faculty this morning. it was the laugh i needed to get through day 8 of the count down. (i'll apologize upfront that i don't have an exact source - i can't get to the onion's website at school - blocked - you know how it goes.)

This was recently published in THE ONION, and I thought maybe, at this time of year, you would enjoy it.


WASHINGTON-A shocking report released by the U.S. Department of Education
this week revealed that a growing number of the nation's educators struggle
on a daily basis with some form of teaching disability.
The study, which surveyed 2,500 elementary and high school level
instructors across the country, found that nearly one out of every five
exhibited behaviors typically associated with a teaching impairment. Among
them: trouble paying attention in school, lack of interest or motivation
during class, and severe emotional issues.

"For teaching-disabled and at-risk educators, just coming to school every
day is a challenge," said Dr. Robert Hughes, a behavioral psychologist and
lead author of the study. "Even simple tasks, like remaining alert and
engaged during lessons, can be a struggle. Unfortunately, unless we take
immediate action, these under-performers will only continue to fall further
behind."

"Our teachers are in trouble," Hughes continued. "Some can't even teach at
a basic sixth-grade level."

As noted in the report, hundreds of schools have already begun setting up
special classrooms in which the teaching- disabled can receive the extra
attention they require, teach at their own unique pace, and be paired up
with patient students who can help to keep them on track.

According to school administrators, new programs like these encourage
marginalized and disenfranchised teachers by rewarding them for showing up
to school prepared and taking an active part in classroom discussions. Many
also have counselors on hand to intervene when an instructor grows
frustrated or throws a tantrum and storms out of the room.

In the new "Teachers First!" program at Wesley Academy in Chicago,
educators who were once labeled "lost causes" and left to flounder in the
system for years on end are now diagnosed with specific teaching disorders,
given extra time to grade difficult assignments, and, in the case of
particularly troubled teachers, moved back a grade.

"We're much more sensitive now to the factors that influence their
behavior: abusive home lives, drug and alcohol problems, or often, the fact
that they never should have been put in regular classrooms to begin with,"
Wesley principal Donald Zicree said. "A lot of these poor men and women have
been told they can't teach for so long that many start to believe it after a
while."

"Rather than punishing our teachers or kicking them out, we give them a
gold star every time they do something right," Zicree continued. "If they
write the correct answer to a math problem on the board, they get a gold
star. If they volunteer to read aloud during English class, they get a gold
star. You'd be amazed what a little positive reinforcement can do. Some of
our teachers† have even stopped drinking in their cars during lunch."

According to Zicree, school officials aren't the only ones excited by the
difference the new programs are making. Many educators have also responded
favorably, realizing that they no longer have to act out or create
disruptions in order to get the attention they so desperately crave.

For a few, like Michael Sturges, a 10th-grade history teacher at Wagar High
School in Council Grove, KS, being put in a special classroom has reawakened
a love for teaching he hasn't felt in years.

"Now that I know I have a teaching disability I don't beat myself up so
much when I have a bad day or can't grasp the material we're working with,"
said Sturges, 38, who has pinned a number of perfectly graded assignments up
on his wall. "I used to think teaching and stuff was pretty lame, but now-I
dunno-I guess it's all right. If anything, being in school now might help me
to get a decent job when I'm older."

Added Sturges, "You know, something that pays more than $24,000 a year."

Guess where I am

I came to orem cemetery for memorial day service - very cool. But since I was in the 'hood I decided to visit my grandparents. They've got a great spot up on the hill. Nice seeing them - although I tend to think of them when I visit orem anyway. They were good grandparents - i'm glad I got to live with them for a few months back in college.

Beware

You know how brushing your teeth after eating candy can make your toothbrush a scary color? Well, I ate a lot of lettuce tonight. Spring mix, actually. Anyway, the toothbrush was an unsightly poo green color. Just so you know.

background for last post

not that it's needed, but i think it's a bit interesting. i had a dream over the weekend. all i remember is the end where i was wandering around a large building looking for my friends but either all the doors were locked or nobody was where they were supposed to be. i finally came across one friend who was sitting at a bar depressed. i joined her. i was wearing a pink bathrobe and had one over stuffed oreo left to share - i had eaten the rest of the package while wandering. as you can imagine, i woke up from the dream a bit depressed. it felt real enough that i actually ate ice cream for breakfast (i had no oreos in the house) and the rest of the day i struggled with similar feelings. so this morning, when i was reading my scriptures and came across that verse in helaman i suddenly felt empowered to take off the bathrobe and throw out the last oreo. metaphorically.

historically may can be a real struggle for me. i always get depressed at the end of the school year - i start missing my kids and missing the ones that have gone on before. i miss all the lost opportunities and truthfully, i fear the future big time. not so much summer, more the NEXT school year. yes, i tend to fear the future. since i have to do a lot in may to get ready for next school year it's a real struggle for me - lots of confused and mixed emotions. add to this stress i'm still coping with the loss of my father two summers ago. this year i've been doing lots better, but i got hit by it big this weekend. and you know how it is when you get sad and stressed, it's easy to find lots of other things to be sad and stressed about. so, like i said, that verse in helaman was a real necessary kick in the pants.

i'd like to report that today was one of my best school days so far. good class discussion, no conflicts with rowdy students - just nice easy goodnes.

Helaman 16:22

This verse spoke to me today. Do you ever find your mind thinking unproductive negative thoughts? I had one of those internal struggles yesterday. In the end I believe truth won out, but it was hard and it may have cost me some joy. My mother used to tell me to count my many blessings - I believe that may be one of the most effective ways to combat any foolish and vain thinking.

warning

don't carry a red folder against your chest with a water bottle in the crook of your arm while wearing a white shirt. if you do, be prepared with a clorox stick - hooray for modern day miracle inventions.

p.s. the yearbooks have arrived! the year of death is nearly over!

tired thursday

i generally wake up on time. most often i wake up before the alarm goes off. this morning i over slept by 10 minutes. 10 minutes can totally throw off my morning routine - i keep my mornings packed and i'd already put off a couple minor things to squeeze into my morning that i normally do before bed. so what did i do? i decided to stay in bed another 45 minutes. somehow in my head i reasoned that i was just skipping out on my morning exercise, granted i only allow 30 minutes for exercise in my schedule - somehow in my tired head it all equaled out. i rarely (think once every 3 years) give myself permission to "sleep in." well it only lasted another 15 minutes. by then i'd done the math and realized i would miss my scripture reading time as well. one of the reasons i fill my morning so full is because getting exercise and scriptures read before work seriously has an impact on how well i feel and how patient i am with my students. for their sakes as much as mine i need to do those two things. well, i can feel it. i can feel that i missed one of the two. maybe i'll take a brisk walk to the office - or do some jumping jacks. or even just a sun salutation will be better than nothing. i had a tough day on tuesday, i'm determined to be better today! one of my favorite lectures for students is that if they act tired they'll only be more tired - it's about time i started acting energized - i need it!

Chocolate Covered Strawberries

I probably should have saved this for a wordless wednesday type of post. instead - we'll call it... manic monday. don't you get a bit manic when eating chocolate covered strawberries? sure, sounds good to me too. you should have seen some of the other photos. really.

Earrings

Ever wonder how much people notice your earrings? My sisiter used to say she felt naked without them and couldn't leave the house without putting at least a basic pair in. Today, in my debate over which ones perfectly completed my outfit, I apparently left with one turqouise dangle and one silver/brown dangle. Nobody noticed. When I got home I showed bret - I made him look at me and tell me if he noticed anything different. I even held the hair back. Finally after a wrong guess and with a little gesturing he figured it out. I should mix and match more often! It would make the decision of which to wear a lot simpler!

Breakfast in tropic

We managed to eat every major meal at a place named after a man. Even ruby was short for reuben. Clarke's might be more of a family name. It's my sister's married name - I took it as a good omen either way. They had some delicious hot cakes. The dishes were brightly colored and the walls had fake brick showing through the plaster - very rustic.

The koa

Speaking of relaxed. This is a shot of my view from bed. I retired around 8. we spent some time sitting on the front porch watching evening come on. We also visited with a stray cat. I did some crocheting. We were tired. The koa was fabulous and perfect for our needs. As you can see i'm in the top bunk. Kristin slept below me and plewe took the full sized bed next to us. The place had wifi, a pool, and the cleanest bathrooms, and best showers ever. I give the bryce canyon koa 10 thumbs up!

Relief

After our strenuous hike we went to ruby's (where we'd sayed on one of our earliest wwww tours) for lunch/dinner. we were exhausted. This photo doesn't fully capture our relief to be sitting but I did get a large pina colada - the epitome of relaxed.

Fairyland

These photos were taken about halfway through. We had lunch shortly after - traditional salami and provolone on sourdough. And some tapioca for dessert. This was also about the time kristin tried to find a bandaid in her pack for a nasty blister on her heel. Alas, we'd left all our first aid stuff in the car. Smart, I know. We would stop every half hour and try to repad it with tissues and napkins. Finally plewe asked an older couple crossing our path if they had a bandaid to spare. They had moleskin - the best invention ever! unfortuantely even that gave out before the end of the hike. When we got back to the rim we left kristin and took the rim trail back to our car (2.7 miles) and drove back to pick up our poor injured sister.

But check out all those great hoodoos! We were standing at the top of a range - so unbelievable to look down on what nature can create. It was also lots of fun to keep saying hoodoo.

Tower bridge

On the way to tower bridge (our original intended destination) we made friends with some germans. They told us how much they enjoyed hiking in sedona that we were persuaded to consider it for a future wwww tour. Another couple pointed out the china wall to us - sorry I didn't take a photo. It was at tower bridge that we ran into the germans again. They encouraged us to do the entire fairyland loop. The rest of the day we'd catch glimpses of them far up the trail - they at least kept me going. At the end of our hike we ran into a young couple that were self described nomads. They'd been hiking for days - everywhere and anywhere. They recommended the needles district. I can't imagine a life of hiking. One full day was enough to tide me over for a while.

Hiking ladies

This picture was taken near the start of our 5 hour, 8 mile hike of fairyland in bryce canyon. We intended to only do a third and turn back but by the time we got to destination tower bridge we were feeling strong enoug we just kept going. Every view was stunning and worth the effort.

Clem

Each wwww tour we get ourselves a mascot. Our first was probably a.j.r. homie - the homie from a grocery store in monroe ny - or some similarly named town. Anyway, clem is this year's mascot. he's a miniature cat that we got at larry's drive in. We kept him in his snow globe like container. In fact, while hiking we found some really pretty yellow dirt that we thought would make good "snow" for him. This photo was taken before we added the dirt.

WWWW 09 stop 1

here we are with empty food trays. Delicious shakes - wow - and hamburgers with real buns. Happiness.

I don't heart qwest

Earlier this week my modem decided to stop working. I called qwest and they confirmed it was broken. Since it was two years old there was nothing to do but accept my internet-less fate. I did a bit of shopping by phone and decided I better at least cancel my internet service with qwest since their defective product made it impossible for me to use their service. In talking to the sales rep I began to think I should cancel everything - phone and internet - afterall, 30 bucks for a landline I use less than my cell phone seems a little ridiculous. And that price would go up to about 40 if I dropped my internet. The salesman did a good job and convinced me to call back the next day and speak to their "loyalty department." when I did, I stated my frustrations and explained my plan to cancel all my services. Then I was put on hold for a few minutes and when the woman came back she said they decided to send me a new modem for free (60 bucks if I paid for it myself) and give me my landline for half price for the next four months - enoug time to decide if I want to bother keeping it. Because truthfully, I was a bit nervous about cancelling it all together. I know they got what they wanted and i'm still paying for a service I may not need - but I also got what I originally wanted - a replacement modem despite the expiration of the warranty. So, what triggered this post, though, was an email they sent me asking for feedback on my recent "service" from qwest. An email! My complaint is that my internet doesn't work and they send me an email. I have to take the survey before monday - well my new modem may arrive on monday or tuesday. Does anyone else see the idiocy in this situation?

friendship

i read another great article in the ny times today. it's all about the value of friend. i loved it! i had to share it!

i thought about sending this to the wwww friends, but then i realized i have so many more i couldn't limit it to them. and although blog world isn't the most personal place to express appreciation for friends, i'm going to do it anyway. i am grateful for the best people a woman could ever ask for. i am awash in the goodness of quality people i feel i can call friend.

what follows is the very last portion of the articel - i tell you, science is amazing!

Last year, researchers studied 34 students at the University of Virginia, taking them to the base of a steep hill and fitting them with a weighted backpack. They were then asked to estimate the steepness of the hill. Some participants stood next to friends during the exercise, while others were alone.
The students who stood with friends gave lower estimates of the steepness of the hill. And the longer the friends had known each other, the less steep the hill appeared.
“People with stronger friendship networks feel like there is someone they can turn to,” said Karen A. Roberto, director of the center for gerontology at Virginia Tech. “Friendship is an undervalued resource. The consistent message of these studies is that friends make your life better.”

stinkin' involuntary transfers!

i guess you could say it's a stinkin' week for me. yesterday we found out which teachers in our school have to be involuntarily transferred. one of the ones we lost is the photography/broadcasting teacher. he was a great resourse for all kinds of technical things. another one we lost is an english teacher. he was the only english teacher in our department who knew how to do anything with technology. he's the one that persuaded us all to start using word 2007. he's the one who helped teachers learn how to use it. he helped them set up their digital projectors. he created all sorts of professional documents our department - heck, our school - needed. without him we will fall back into the 20th century!

i'm determined to step up to the plate! i've taken on yearbook at my school and with it has come another slew of technical chellenges, far surpassing using word. i have to brag a bit, i learned word 2007 pretty decently on my own. i only had a couple questions for the co-worker. anyway, without him to lean on i see there's a much larger burden now on all of our shoulders. since i'm the next youngest in the department it's not only expected of me, i realize i have no one to turn to myself!

my new goal and determination are being inspired by a really cool scholarship opportunity offered by microsoft. if i win i get to attend some conference for computer stuff! if i go i might even learn the right words for all that computer stuff! how exciting is that?

Trees

This is a bosnian something or other. Saturday last I took a tree tour of byu's campus. I took this photo to share with the good buddy vanya and decided it may be worth sharing on the blog. I loved the tree tour. But it would have been 100 percent better if more trees had leaves. It was fun to people watch too. The campus is not the same anymore - neither are fashions - but essentially it's all the same. Flirting, eating, running, reading, you know - being alive and young. Pretty cool.

stinkin' racket!

i'm very upset. okay, yesterday i was more upset. today i have the emotions under control, even though today i found out i have a bigger reason to be upset. hooray for control! as the good friend plewe has advised, i patted myself on the head and told my ego everything was okay.

anyway, i still want to vent about the stinkin' racket going on taking advantage of teachers! back with the fabulous president we had earlier, a law was passed that caused much outrage among people in my profession. maybe you're familiar with it - nclb? at first i figured it wouldn't affect me negatively - i could handle the requirement - afterall, i'm a professional! well, i've since learned my lesson. somehow long ago i got teaching reading which led to me teaching english. only once in all my years have i managed to teach even one period of social studies. but, because of this fabulous law, i'm legally able to teach social studies, but not english. i'm considered highly qualified to teach social studies, but not english. quick parents - send me all your children needing a quality education in history and geography - i'll give them the best the state has to offer! but don't you dare let me go near your students when it comes to english - they might come out stupid and lacking in reading and writing skills. i know what my regular readers are thinking, "wait sarah, didn't you just finish a degree in english? didn't you just fight tooth and nail to get weber to acknowledge that you've successfully learned enough english to have a real live degree?" and the anser is yes! i did and i have the transcripts and the pretty certificate to prove it! but.... nclb says that's not enough. nclb says unless i have a master's degree then i'm not highly qualified. excuse me, i mean a master's degree in english - my master's in education with an emphasis on teaching reading doesn't count. oh, wait, nclb, in all its good wisdom, has allowed for an alternate way of proving my qualifications. i can take a test. yes! i can pay 130 dollars to some "education testing SERVICE" for the opportunity to take a test (that everyone says is stupidly easy) to prove that i am highly qualified to teach english.

yesterday i wanted to stand on principle and refuse to take the dumb test and just force my school district to find a job for me teaching social studies. forget that i've served as a literacy specialist for the district, been a coah/mentor to other language arts teachers, acted as a yearbook editor - i'm not highly qualified - i need to be in a classroom teaching history and/or geography. that's what i'm most qualified to do. that's the best way for me to serve our nation's children. i tell you - it's a racket! i know, because just the other night i watched "on the waterfront" - i tell you i could have been a contender! but instead i gave in and just paid my stinkin' 130 bucks to the stinkin' "service" so i can continue to teach the stinkin' english.

did i ever tell you about the english teacher in high school who told me NOT to major in english? i listened, then i let the system convince me otherwise.

(i wish i weren't so tempted to agree with nclb about my qualifications - but really maybe i'd be better suited in a social studies room.)

refi

i just finished signing my life away. i refinanced the house. now instead of 5.75 i have 4.65 - i'm telling myself it was worth it. i think i now have a tree's worth of papers to take home and file away. if i were better at math i'd be able to say when this house would be paid for, but as it is i just have a general goal of another five years. here's hoping i'm right! i was reminded of "the secret" today - i've decided it's time i place an order with the universe. house paid for in five. house paid for in five. house paid for in five. house paid for in five. house paid for in five.

surprise!

i can't believe i've been such a poor blogger this spring. it's true i don't have a lot of free time, but you'd think i'd have time to tell a story or two! while i was away on my holiday i went to the lego store with my nephews. we were standing in line for about an hour (it was a free mini-kit night and the families were out) so to kill time i browsed through the photos on my cell phone. there were a few i had meant to turn into blogs! i don't think i ever did. such old news, though.

anyway, the trip to california was fabulous! the drive wasn't too bad either. in fact, i like long road trips - lots of good solid conversation. while in california i started crocheting an afghan. i'm not sure why. i was in the middle of tatting and my nieces commented that they remembered i'd been working on it for a few years. it's supposed to be a piano runner, but at this rate it will be a coffin runner. my one niece had a book of afghans and they were so pretty that i decided to put off the coffin runner and start an afghan. silly me. anyway, i'm making good progress! it uses a q sized hook which helps make it go faster. it is made up of 95 hexagons. if i do four a week then i'll be done in about 6 months. that's my goal! i can do about one hexagon a half hour so i figure with a good strong push each weekend i can keep my goal.

in other news, this weekend i finished reading the hiding place. it was on the religiously heavy side, but i didn't mind. in fact, i probably needed it. i thought it was an appropriate message for my easter weekend. in fact, this morning i caught myself having a selfish thought and the message from the book popped in my head about true charity. only god is capable of doing good - we are his hands - but it is he that changes hearts. we should never judge ourselves to be better than others, or someone else to be unworthy of our love. the women in the book loved everyone and strived to share the light of god's love even with the darkest people in their lives - their concentration camp guards.

there are 8 weeks left of school - 38 days not counting today - which means only 19 a days and 19 b days. holy cow! my feeling of amazement and excitement is mirrored in my niece's expression when she came down the stairs easter morning to see all the surprises left by the easter bunny.

thoughts

it's been so long since i posted i couldn't even remember the last thing i'd shared. well this morning i did some reading in the book of mormon about how the good nephites experienced a schism - one group wanted to have a king and practice priest craft. the others feared they'd lose their right to worship the way they'd like. it got me thinking about how so many sacred things are turned and manipulated for selfish purposes. i can't help but wonder what i may be using for my personal gain. are my intentions of service truly selflessly motivated? do i act out of love and kindness or self gratification? maybe that's why it's so important that our motives are pure - if you can put yourself aside, deny selfish impulses, then it's likely your actions will be for the good of others. tough. anyway, i was planning to just keep all those thoughts to myself, but then my sister in law sent a picture that just made me laugh. and at the same time feel sad for the world. her brother currently lives in jerusalem. this is a flyer he received in the mail the other day. look closely, the details speak for themselves.

p.s. it's spring break starting tomorrow - hooray for a holiday! i'm headed to sacramento to see my good sister's family - the ones that like to put on an opera each year. the same sister who gave me the recipe for those delicious cinnamon rolls you see below. it'll be a really great break! oh, and in other good news, i just decided to NOT teach summer school this year. that means i'll have no job, which leaves me feeling unproductive, but at the same time super happy that i'll get a real summer break for the first time in all my years of teaching.

Cinnamon rolls

I'm no pioneer woman but I do like to cook - and here's a photohraph of my latest. The batch I made a few weeks ago looked better but these taste better (note small hole on upper right). I'm taking them to work to celebrate a coworker's bday. She doesn't like chocolate and I figured no one was thrilled to try prune cake or garbanzo bean cake.

seeing

"Everybody can be great because anybody can serve. You don't have to have a college degree to serve. You don't have to make your subject and verb agree to serve. You don't have to know about Plato and Aristotle to serve. You only need a heart full of grace. A soul generated by love. And you can be that servant." - Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

i read this quote on sherpa's blog the other day. it made me happy. it made me want to see people differently. i hope i can SEE people serving instead of what i normally see. i believe we see what we look for. i want to look for goodness and service.

and in case you were wondering, i failed to bake this weekend. i DID practice the piano a lot, though. and i got to enjoy a very peaceful experience at the temple. it was a weekend full of blessings. here's hoping i can enjoy this week as well.

working

but i'd rather be home baking. just in a mood. i really struggled this morning to convince myself it was only thursday. by the time saturday comes i hope i'm still in the mood to bake.

Ghost pencil

Who else suffers from this affliction? How do you teachers out there avoid it? Being the ever ready and practical teacher that I am, I keep a pencil tucked behind my ear all day. You never know when a kid will need one. Plus I use it write everything that's not done on a computer. I can't live without my pencil. But then... when I get home... I find myself checking my ear to see if it's still there. Like getting off a boat, or at the end of rollerskating, I still have the sensation that there's a pencil up there. Usually there isn't since the last act of the day is to return the pencil to the designated mug. But to be sure my hand goes up to verify I am pencil free. Seriously, this must happen at least once each night.
Today was long. Sophomore orientation from 5:30-8:30. And do I get paid? Doubt it. Such is the life of a teacher. Hmmm, this whine is sounding familiar. Did I already post about it today? I think it's time for bed.

march madness

okay, this is NOT a basketball post. it's just a little peek into my own madness that happens in march. first of all - it's a pretty stressful month. yearbook deadlines, end of third term, no holiday, weird weather, and the most annoying for me.... i keep wanting to use the number four to represent the month. i for the life of me can and never have been able to remember to use a three. it bugs. three three three. it is march. the third month. three.

Papercut!

Look what I did! I know - not the most productive use of my prep. But fun! Thanks cindy!

It works!

Okay so now to share somerhing super insightful and significant since that's what all my posts are about. On the way to my car this afternoon I came across a weed growing in a crack in the sidewalk. I took it as the first sign of spring. Shoot now I wish i'd photoed it for you all to see. Trust me... spring is virtually here!

Mobile test

I blog from my phone ALL the time but lately it's not working. I watched the how to video so now i'm trying again.

the end

ugh! i hate it when i write a beautiful post and then the internet gremlins lose it! i was saying.... i finally came to the end of my valentine's chocolates. i also noticed that my flowers from valentine's are on their last leg and will have to be disposed of this weekend. i am a fan of consumable gifts, but when they finally end then i'm a bit sad. i want another holiday! speaking of holidays, i'm taking tomorrow off. i need to get a leak fixed in my bathroom and it just so happens my free plumber is available tomorrow. so, i guess i get a holiay! hooray! and speaking of holidays.... we're soooo nearly to the 3/4 mark. i'm trying really hard not to be done yet. april may be the longest month ever.

socks

there was a big to-do in the middle of third period today because a girl thought that her friend and i had matching socks. they were totally different - mine being pink, black, and gray, hers being pink, brown, green, and gray. mine matched my outfit perfectly. hers were just there. still, i'd rather not match my students in any way shape or form. that doesn't mean i'm giving up my socks, though. i'd rather match my students than look like some boring old nude stockings, sweater, and jumper wearing person.

what i read on my day off

Zacarias, My Brother: The Making of a Terrorist by Abd Samad Moussaoui

My review

rating: 3 of 5 stars
interesting to have read this right after finishing pol pot. i'm convinced that selfish thought patterns (racism/bigotry in general) are the root of the world's problems. in some ways our world really is very immature. we behave like 3 year olds yet we have weapons of grown ups.


View all my reviews.

what is love?

i figure i should post something related to vday. i thought this story from my sister's family was perfect.

Yesterday Lanelle and Risa had a conversation that, included the following:

"Why did you do that Mom?"

"Because I love you."

"Well, that's not very loving."

"What is the most loving thing I could I do for you?"

"Give me ice cream."

As we were trying to recreate the conversation today, Lanelle changed her answer so that now she says "hugging" is the most loving thing we can do. What do you think is closer to the truth?

prayer

i've been a bit under the weather this last week. it makes me grateful for the ability to breathe freely. i'm also very grateful for tissues. and speaking of gratitude, i'm very grateful for prayer. i took tuesday off work to "rest up." i did rest. i also finished pol pot - hooray! but then i went to work on wednesday. that was hard. i came home from work utterly exhausted. i had worked late (yearbook deadline) and then ran to a meeting (where i made random comments) and then raced home (had to use the bathroom) and by that point i was in tears. i was overwhelmed and tired and feeling totally inadequate and lacking the desire to even try to be adequate. i did all i knew to do. i kneeled down and prayed for help. i prayed for relief and comfort. while praying i was amazed at the list of things i had to be grateful for. by the end i felt tons better. i went off to a friends house who had made me chicken noodle soup. while visiting she managed to solve a couple of my nagging problems. i went home and to bed that night with another long list of things to thank god for. hooray for prayer that somehow manages to make you feel better. even if you're still going through a box of tissues a day. at least i can face my students!

who am i?

it's been a while since i took a personality test. courtesy of julie i took one today! thanks jules - it was a good one and i believe my type fits. yellow IS my color, after all.

big news!

Weber did it! They finally awarded me my second bachelor's - I now have a BS in English! It's a miracle. I may have worked harder for this than I did my first degree from BYU. Remember all those painful noises I made about Shakespeare - over a year ago? And remember all the posts about riding the bus? Did i ever write about the inappropriate final? After applying twice, submitting two sets of transcripts, going through two separate appeal processes, not to mention endless time on the phone, I was seriously thinking I'd have to take them to court. But then, miracle and happiness!

calling

i haven't posted in awhile and it occurred to me i may have not told all my friends about my new calling at church. since my friends read the blog i figured this might be an easy way to inform those i may have neglected. sorry! anyway, it's also a chance for me to get sympathy notes and possibly/hopefully promises of help and suggestions. this month i got called to be one of the activities committee co-chairs. i no longer get to organize the humanitarian service projects - or as one guy likes to call me - i'm no longer the service lady. now i'm the activity lady. i need to get on the new calling though - figure out the people on my committee - give them a holler - build some relationships - and hopefully do some planning. here's hoping i learn to love it. everyone says i'll be great since i plan so many parties, but truthfully i don't feel like i plan that many - and they're usually pretty low key and easy to throw together with the help of quality friends. i guess i just need to take that attitude with these bigger activities. my old co-chair in the humanitarian calling told me that my energy was motivating for her - i'm hoping that the same can be true in this new calling. here's to motivating energy!

Hobby airport

I'd just like to inform the world that may be considering flying to houston. If you're destination is on the south end of the city definitely consider using hobby airport. I've never seen nicer restrooms in an airport. Never. The stalls are all family size. There were 3 hooks to use - better than many dressing rooms at the mall! The sinks are those cool trough like ones with automatic spouts all along. And there's enough general floor space to feel like you can fix your hair without taking up counter space. Oh and the rest of the airport is quiet and relaxed and crowd free. Very nice.

NO inversion

This looks like heaven - clear blue sky! This is the view from my hotel room window. I love the floor the ceiling windows. I love my room. Mostly I just love the weather.

Insights

On this momentous day i'm trying to find some insightful purpose to the contrast of me sitting in a "summit" for high school teachers in my district on small learning communities, compared to where i'd rather be - d.c. "SLC" is the latest greatest idea in closing achievement gaps. I haven't been in the system long enough to gauge how much of a passing fad this may be but my school seems to have a fair amount of skeptics. I know i'm not feeling the vision. I'm just trying to do my duty. I AM feeling the vision, though, of obama being sworn in as our new president. I love historic moments. I want to feel a part of things. Maybe I should shift my desire to being a part of this educational movement. I get to head to houston tomorrow to check out how some great school down there is doing it. Then I can return home and be a big advocate and leader for our school. We'll see how it goes. Here's to a hope in change!

Happy inauguration!

I attended an inaugural ball tonight. Look, bret and I are posing with the president! It was a fabulous party and I was amazed at the number of people I knew there. I bet if i'd stayed longer I could have seen another 10! it was one of those nights I wished I had a camera since there were so many happy pretty people there!

nerves

ugh! some of you may not know, but about 5 years ago i got a bad back ache that resulted in a less than normal right foot/leg - a bit of numbness has remained. well... two days ago my right hand started to tingle. i started fearing a similar problem as my foot. but then yesterday i was tingle/pain free! who knows why but i was happy. trouble is, this morning, it came back. this time i think i sense more of an ache or tightness in my shoulder, so that's probably causing it - but really - won't it please go away?! i don't need this in my life.

starting monday right

it's not often that i wake up on a monday ready to go. but today i did. not sure why. could be a great sunday evening. i got to hear president monson speaking to the young adults of the church - he's a funny man with good advice. i definitely came away uplifted and happy to be alive - challenges and all. so when i got up this morning i happily did my sun salutations, made a delicous lunch of roast beef sandwich on 10 grain bread with a fuji apple for dessert. i think another reason for my happy monday morning was that i decided before going to bed that i was going to wear jeans today. in fact, since our ward is having a luau for family home evening tonight, i went ahead and wore my nearly hawaiian shirt to school. (it's from the philippines and is not quite the perfect print, but the cut works and it's super comfy plus associated with great memories.) anyway, to really top off my monday morning, one of my yearbook students decided to deliver a plate of chocolate chip oatmeal cookies! holy cow how did i get so lucky? it's my favorite flavor. she gave me a good dozen, of which only 5 are left. now who can beat that for a happy monday morning?

Cashews

Covered in chocolate you'd think they'd be pretty good - but really, they're nothing special. Can'teven properly taste the cashew. Now give me an almond and i'd be happy. Or at least dark chocolate. Besides, eating half a pound in one day is a really bad idea on other levels.

iFLY

A few weeks ago I discovered something i'd written on my planner that left me confused, "death." I was happy to finally remember what i'd meant by that. I meant that I was going sky diving. Turns out I just did indoor sky diving so it really wasn't anything near death, although they do require you to sign a lengthy legal document excusing them from liability in case of death. Well, I went yesterday and thought it was pretty stinking fun. If it didn't cost 50 bucks I might really insist everyone try it. I got to go for free. Hooray for free passes!

Potluck!

Every year some old friends and I gather for a "corner girls" reunion. We usually do potluck. This year we lucked out with a delicious array, if somewhat beige. The hostess was going to make soup but forgot we were coming so instead she pulled out the baklava and some of the best chocolate around. I brought homemade bread to go with the soup. We also had chinese pot stickers, south west egg rolls (that chile's can get pretty creative), and pastilla (selling is probably way off) that's a chicken dish from ethiopia. I loved the variety of food but mostly I loved the company!

lazing around

so i've been on holiday. hooray. i don't know how people can do christmas without a decent holiday from work. i spent a couple days holed up at my mother's - horizontal snow was a bit intimidating. we watched dvds from the library - a couple of "i spy" and "lois and clark." i like tv on dvd. i did a bit of tatting. i really need to complete that piano runner i'm doing - i think i have another couple decades of work. i wish i had a hobby that produced faster - at least crocheting only took me 6 years to do an afghan. today, though, i was really lazy. i read all morning - finished "the memory keeper's daughter" - good but can't say i recommend it. i think it just left me all nostalgic and sad - not sure i needed to feel all that - i get nostalgic and sad without reading a made up story. then i finally dragged myself out of the house to do some errands for work - took a lot less time than i thought - hooray! so i let myself visit a pregnant friend for a good hour. i helped her bake a chocolate cake - yum! then i came home and made a broccoli dish as posted by good cindy and hoping to make a prune cake as posted by the good pioneer woman. i love cooking. i wish i were a stay at home mom - then i could cook and clean and maybe even read to my heart's content. i can't say i'm looking forward to next monday - there's still plenty of playing left in me! i have about two other books i still need to read!

2008

inspired by my good friends the flynns i thought i'd try a little "year in review" with photos. we'll see how much i can actually document!

i began my year by attending the symphony. i love the symphony. i got to go again in the fall. i am lucky. i'm sure january had other events, just apparently none that i documented!
in february i went on my annual women of the world whirl wind tour with plewe and kristin. we enjoyed the comforts of staying in a retirement community, vista del sol. it was nice to be in the land of sol.

march brought more good bonding with friends. there was the annual ski and bbq at solitude. nothing like a bit of snow and sun to say spring.
march is also the time of year to celebrate the birth of my good roommate. we enjoyed dinner and then a bit of u2 at the gateway. here we're kicking it on the ride down the elevator at the planetarium where we saw laser u2

in april i decided to lead a bunch of friends to the spiral jetty - one of my long time favorite destinations. it's full of melancholy for me and i wanted to see if another trip with different people might change my feelings - i don't think it did. but it was a great fun outing.
april also gave me the opportunity to gather with some friends for some music and the spoken word at easter. i like this photo - makes me think we're ready to win a round of family feud.
i believe april is also when jubi graduated from the u which meant another fun party with good people. (i'm noting the events i found photos for - just so you know.)

at the end of may (memorial day to be exact) i hooked up with family to visit dad's grave. it seemed the thing to do. mom was good enough to come with us and take a photoschool got out about a week later and that very day i headed south with good friends to visit fruita - a.k.a. capitol reef national park. it's a great destination!
it allowed for some mild hiking and more intense stuff for the other people.

with school officially over i had the fun opportunity of teaching summer school with a short break of visiting dc in between sessions. my sister's family lives there and my other sister's family was visiting - so i got two for the price of one. here i'm hanging with the nieces and nephews after a long day of lots of walking.
and then there is a big gap in photos to share. i spent most of july home scrapbooking. i had a big black boot on my foot - i'm sure my faithful readers remember the photos and don't need to see them again. here's a photo of my graduating class at a pep rally - i basically scrapbooked my entire life from birth to the year 2000. this christmas break i had great dreams of doing the last 8 years, but i have a hard time believing that will really happen.

july was also about the time i renewed my goal of weekly temple attendance, please overlook the fact that this photo was taken around christmas.
then in august i had a birthday! lucky for me lots of friends gathered together to celebrate with me. we had great food and great entertainment - all my favorite things!
right before school started i took a trip to cedar city where i got a tattoo. just a temporary one, though. mark did the purchasing for me. the end of august also meant a trip to lava hotsprings - but i have no photos to document that good time.
hurricane (near cedar city) has a whole lot of great things to see, like this 100 year old fruit cake.
september was full of celebrating. here i am with chris celebrating the engagement of plewe and dennis.
this photo comes from the wedding shower i helped host for plewe. she is thrilled with her traditional gift of lingerie specially designed by danielle and company.

in early october my granny came for a couple weeks to escape the lack of electricity in her home as a result of hurrican ike. this photo was taken on conference weekend.
after sepetember comes my favorite month - october! which means my biggest party all year - halloween! you can possibly infer my political leanings based on the photo below. besides celebrating halloween, i was also excited about the election in november.
these are my fellow hostesses - there's no party throwing without their help!
in november i took a trip to see my good sister and her family in california. i have no photo of the opera that was the purpose of my trip, but this shot of my nephews shows how much fun they are to visit.

december meant more parties. the ward party was all about friends and music and food and being entertained. i got to play the jingle bells while my piano playing buddies did a duet of sleigh ride on the piano. too bad i don't have a photo of that.

and that my friends is 2008, minus about a week or more. i can't say much will happen before it's all over so this is a fine stopping place. please excuse any redudancy in my stories, or stealing of photos that you may have taken and i likely copied to my own my computer. photo sharing has never been easier.

Look!

I got a new niece last night - at 11:59! I got to "tend" the older brother which meant I slept at my mother's house in the room next to his. Easy and fun for me.

gifts

sometimes receiving gifts from students is rather awkward. today, after handing out my usual "holiday cards" to my reading students, one girl approached me afterward asking if i liked fragrances. then she proceeded to give me three different bath and body products - all different flavors because, as she said, she didn't know what one i'd like. that was only a bit awkward because it was way more than i needed or deserved, but the most awkward part was when a boy standing nearby (who has some major social challenges) insisted he would bring me a gift too and asked what i liked. i kept saying i was fine and didn't need anything - just wanted him to be on time to class, blah blah. he kept offering jewelry and candy, and i finally insisted he could just write me a nice note, like what i gave. so he left promising me he'd write a poem over the holiday break. did i mention he's only been in my class less than two weeks?
now i smell like wild honeysuckle. :)

stress

snow does little to make for a pleasantly relaxed school day. it doesn't help that the snow made my photographer an hour late, thus missing two groups that were scheduled during first period. such is life - nothing can be done about it - but my preferred solution didn't appeal to the principal and she didn't offer a viable solution of her own, so i've spent the last 10 minutes doing a bit of fuming and reminding myself the world won't end and in a few months i probably won't notice or care. that's what stress is - good for nothing in the long run. what would help me feel better is getting some lesson plans made for the post holiday weeks.

Remains of the day

This plate was full half an hour ago.

cookies!

it's that time of year when cookies come flowing. yum! i got my first plate today from a yearbook student - my favorite chocolate chip oatmeal. happiness is in a cookie. my sister sent this photo of my niece. they made gingerbread men. too cute to not share. speaking of gingerbread men... my other sister in california who has 6 home schooled kids that eat home cooked food and wear home made clothes, was baking some gingerbread men this weekend as well. the neighbor kid was over and utterly amazed that people could actually make them at home. she was thrilled to decorate her own and take it home. sometimes i forget how limited people's experiences are.

happy stories

today i started out my reading class by asking them for happy stories. do you know what i got? i guess it was no different than "good news minutes" in relief society. i got "my bday is in a week." i also got "i lost 2 pounds." they tried. i think it is unfortunate that more rejoicing doesn't come immediatly to mind when given the chance to share some happy stories. so now i think it's fair for me to come up with a happy story.

school is out the end of next week. on that following saturday i get to tend my nephew while my sister gives birth to a new niece. i will be making walnut shrimp for her - she loves it (who doesn't) and i want to try a new recipe i got from my good uncle at thanksgiving. then later that evening i get to attend a gathering of my old friends - the ones that might as well be family for how well they know me and the pain i've been to them over the years. i sure like those people. as for something more immediate - well i have banana cream pie waiting for me at home. yum! and leftover chinese food. can it get better? food sure does rank high for me on the level of happy stories.

how about the rest of you? any happy stories to get over the hump day?

scary

on my way to work this morning i nearly hit someone in the crosswalk. granted, she was crossing when the light was green - so she wasn't exactly in the right - but that wouldn't have mattered if i'd hit her. there were two trucks stopped in the left lane, but the car in my lane, on the right was turning right - i assumed the trucks just hadn't yet gotten rolling. as i was practically five feet from being in the intersection i noticed the waddling woman entering my lane - i had to swerve a bit to be sure to miss her. for a second i thought about braking but that may have only caused more problems. dark cold mornings don't make for ideal driving conditions.

choose the right

i know - it's not like me to blog so much. i had some down time - i'm like a pendulum. plus, i'm up, the computer is on, and i just watched the funniest clip - i had to share. my niece learned "jingle bells" last christmas. she's about 3 i think. maybe 4? sheesh time flies - i think her bday is in may. anyway, she was singing the song, and as children often do, she substituted different words by accident. in the clip she's bouncing up and down singing "jingle bells jingle bells, oh what fun, it is choose the right, in one horse open sleigh." technically, she may not be right, but shouldn't it be fun to choose the right? i think i can work this into my visiting teaching message for tomorrow night. we'll see!

Snow

I like the season, and I like snow, but I don't like driving in snow. Oh please, snow go away by 7 pm tonight. I know - kinda late - it's that time of year again - parent teacher conferences! Wahoo! Try not to be jealous. I expect to have a decent crowd, though, because I seem to have given a few unpleasant grades this term. Such is the nature of second term - the enthusiasm really drops. To help third term be more excited I give an assignment at the very start where the students have to persuade me they deserve an A at the end of the term - part persuasive and part visual. Good things for a 10th grader to do.

Now off to track down a copy of Julius Caesar - starring Charlton Heston. I hear the kids love it. Okay, they love it compared to reading the play.

Celebrating the holiday

So far i'm loving december. I just returned from seeing a dance version of "it's a wonderful life." i'll agree, life is wonderful - even with all its tangles. :) I am grateful for every single one. When I came in I saw my december ensign sitting on my bed. Even though it's late I chose to read an article about a man whose life was changed because his classmate opened up to him and shared something of value. I love courage and I love when people courageously show their love for others. I am grateful for the immense amount of love i've felt this year. I can't begin to find words to describe the pure joy I feel. But then I remembered this photo I took earlier. I took it so I could share the hilarity of it on my blog, but the truth is - I love the genuine spirit of the happy waving smiling snowman. He's crammed under a low ceiling and yet it doesn't stop him from waving. He's giving it his all. He's a good example of spreading joy.

Leftovers

You know how leftovers make for a great dinner the rest of the week? Well that's true if leftovers consist of more than christmas goodies. Tonight I had mexican wedding cakes and english toffee for my dinner. To be healthy I topped it off with leftover stawberry/cranberry jello stuff left over from t-day. At least i'm getting to bed before 10:30!!! Did I mention that my wakeup time weekdays is 5? Yep.

Music and more

Tonight I hosted (with the total help of super friends) a little christmas party. I wanted it to be open house pop in and chat while eating treats sort of thing. But I also wanted a short musical recital - like back in the day when they'd have a bit of music by the women who "played." I also wanted it to be a sort of service project. So... I invited people to bring canned goods for the food bank. They could show up any time between 7:30 and 8. I had probably a dozen different treats set out. Then at 8 I stopped the chatting and introduced our musical program. Luckily I have very talented friends. We had a piano duet, piano solos, a guitar/vocal number, little german numbers on the accordion and then a couple beautiful trumpet solos. Then to finish it off we all sang a couple christmas songs accompanied by the piano and trumpet. After the music there was another good half hour to hour of chit chat. It was a complete success. I love seeing so many people gathered together and enjoying themselves. Plus they all said it was a good holiday mood building activity. And as a bonus for me I have my decorations up to last the month and a ton of cookies left over that I can give to the neighbors as a holiday gift. Did I mention how much I enjoyed myself? Well I did. Now I must sleep. I have really good friends. I only wish more could have been invited and been able to come.

ow

man, some days are really bad. and some days, you think things are really bad and then you get a good slap in the face and you resort to blogging, which solves nothing, only procrastinates a bit. it's a monday after a holiday - i stayed up a bit too late, was a bit too emotional, and here i am at school (finally on prep) only now i'm facing midterm grades, and doing final proofs for my yearbook job. i'm new to this yearbook thing and every new step feels like a major mountain. i can't tell you how much faith i have to exercise - life would be so much easier if we just gave up at the first sign of difficulty. wait, that can't be true. we like to think it would be so much easier, but i know in the end it only gets harder. for instance, our school recently had a break-in/theft. we just learned that the perpetrator is a former student that failed to graduate. as my students pointed out, being a high school drop out can only lead to a life of desperation. i'm sure dropping out of whatever challenge you face probably will have similar repercussions. anyway, for how whiny i was feeling and trying to make myself stand up and be a woman, i just learned that the single mother of a couple students here just passed away. now that is humbling. that gives me a fresh perspective on the mountain i face. i'm sorry to have whined. i'm sorry i wasted a minute feeling inadequate and scared.