capitol reef

you should all go there. in fact the ny times this morning recommended it as a summer destination spot - up there with alaska's glaciers. the one i want to do is going from chicago to seattle by train. anyway, here are my weekend stories:

we took a pit stop at a "panoramic view" rest stop. can you see the panorama behind me? we were very impressed with the cleanliness and friendliness of the location. i recommend it. too bad i can't say exactly where it is.
for dinner we stopped in bicknell at the sunglow family restaurant where they are famous for their pickle and pinto bean pie. apparently, back in the day, their pickle pie was so famous and delicious (it was adapted from some recipe in a magazine supposedly), that a group of bikers would come down from slc every weekend just for the pie. they wanted the recipe so they made an exchange. the bikers gave them the pinto bean recipe. now the restaurant serves both. i liked the place, despite the excessively stinky bathroom and slow service.
i of course ordered some pickle pie - mostly in honor of my brother in law who a few years ago insisted that the men in the family have "bonding" by making a bunch of gross sounding pies. i think it was because father was always a fan of raisin pie. i liked the pickle pie then and i liked it on this trip!

we found our group in the massive campgrounds by spotting mark setting up a tent. hooray! there must have been over a hundred campsites - we were in 43 and 44. that evening we attended the ranger's presentation on the stars. she advocated for not using lights excessively to limit light pollution. i thought it was funny that the little amphitheater was overly lit and there were little trail marker lights all along leading to the amphitheater. the public campgrounds were sufficiently lit!

the next morning we all split up in various directions. my group of girls were all suffering from one ailment or another (my back has hurt all week) so we took the two miler round trip hike to hickman's arch. very nice! here are a few photos documenting that adventure, unfortunately i failed to take any of the arch itself:

this is the "dome" that looks like the capitol building that gives capitol reef it's nave. i learned this great fact because we paid for one of those self guided tour brochures at the start of the hike. i liked it a lot because it created many mini-destinations.

this is a picture of "roundleaf buffaloberry" a plant that has silvery reflective leaves that help the plant retain moisture by reflecting sunlight.

we learned (by attending the 18 minute video at the visitor's center) that water, although seemingly absent from the environment, is very present and very influential on the surroundings. you can see from this photo how the rock has been shaped by puddles of water wearing away bits of "cement" (that's what the brochure called it) in the rock.

i took a little break under this rock overhang. i liked the colors.

after getting to the arch the brochure guides you out to a rim overlook. here is a picture of callie documenting our arrival.

i saw this piece of rock (?) and wondered what made the beautiful wood pattern. could it really be wood? you know, the petrified kind?

after our hike we relaxed in a picnic site to eat lunch and cool off. i lay on the ground under this tree. the place was full of cottonwoods. most of them were covered in webby sacks made by tent caterpillars. i learned that the tent caterpillars spend most of their life in the caterpillar stage eating the leaves of the cottonwood. they only live as moths for about a day. apparently most moths don't have mouths that work to eat so they are short lived, long enough to mate and lay eggs. sorry i didn't get a picture of the nasty webby cocoon looking things.

here is a picture of the caterpillar, though. they were everywhere. this one i found on the boardwalk that led to many petroglyphs made by the freemont indians - named after the freemont river which is named for some explorer named freemont.
and here is my attempt at photographing some petroglyphs. pretend you can see them.
the petroglyphs were enjoyed actually before hiking to hickman's arch. we also used our saturday morning to explore the pioneer era farm house (now gift shop) and the old one-room school house. i think they said it was in use until about 1949. it was small. apparently only about 10 families at the most ever lived in fruita, the small pioneer town which used to occupy the space that is now headquarters for the national park.
behind the school is a large rock where pioneers once carved "fruita grade school." you can sort of seeing the carving in this photo. it mostly is worn away.


this was one cool place to visit. i highly recommend taking a trip down there - only about a 3 hour drive if callie is your driver.

Regret

The chocolates. Bad. Not meant to be eaten all at once. Why do I always forget.

Rewards of teaching

I love yearbook day! This came as a thank you from one of my favorites.

me!

maybe this is better for a profile page. but i need blogging material. this came from one of those mass forwards my granny likes to send. feel free to use and send your own mass emails or post on your blog like i did.

Hit forward and place an X by all the things you've done and remove the X from the ones you have not. Answer the 30 questions at the end and send it to your friends (including me).

(x) Skipped school - only sort of but with mom's permission and it was to go to the library to do research for a school assignment.
(x) Watched someone die - the memory is still too fresh. it'll be the anniversary next week.
(x) Gone on a blind date - i get a kick out of them
(x) Been to Mexico - lived there 5 years
(x ) Been to Florida - wish i could remember - i was only about 2
(x ) Been to the Caribbean - doesn't puerto rico count? i'm counting it.
(x) Been overseas
(x) Been on a plane
( ) Jumped out of a plane
( ) Been on a Helicopter
(x) Been on a train - took one to ny with my 7th grade math class - crazy fun - what were the teachers thinking????
(x) Been lost - metaphorically and all
(x) Been on the opposite side of the country - every side imaginable except alaska and hawaii
(x) Gone to Washington, DC - heck i'll be there in two weeks to visit the sis - hooray!
(x) Swam in the ocean - learned to swim in shark infested waters no less!
(x) Cried yourself to sleep - tears happen
( ) Played cops and robbers
(x) Recently colored with crayons - does the last year count as recent? i'm hoping so
(x) Sang Karaoke - ah, those college days of residence halls association conferences
(x) Paid for a meal with coins only - my parents bought me breakfast of good 'n plenties out of a vending machine when i was a kid - we were on the road - it was food.
(x) Done something you told yourself you wouldn't - the only thing coming to mind was getting my master's - how did that happen?
(x) Made prank phone calls - i imagine i did this when i was kid - pre caller id days - but it sure was a long time ago.
( ) Laughed until some kind of beverage came out of your nose
(x) Caught a snowflake on your tongue - well, i've tried to plenty, but i can't say i was totally successful - that i can remember.
(x) Danced in the rain - i love the rain! but never formally danced with a partner - just solo danced. it would be a dream. where's that jesse?
( ) Written a letter to Santa Claus
( ) Been kissed under the mistletoe
( ) Watched the sunrise with someone you care about
(x) Blown bubbles
(x) Gone ice-skating
(x) Gone water Skiing - tried. failed. oh well.
(x) Gone to the movies - duh!

and that is all.

it's all coming back to me now

that song is playing. i love it. i had to share. something about the era in which i first became familiar with it. "when you touch me like this...." well, those words are just terribly provocative and make me a bit embarrassed. basically what comes back to me are memories of youth dances - efy in particular. yes, there was that first real mormon boy crush i had. his friend liked my sister so he danced with me. he had that charm and style that makes a girl melt. he made me feel amazing - like a duckling turned swan. somehow he managed to make me believe for the length of a song that i was the most amazing and desirable girl on the dance floor. he smelled like dentyn. happy memories. jesse was his name. he was a bit short - but boy could he dance. yep, it's all coming back to me now. where or where has jesse gone? i can't help but wonder.

okay - back to life now. really.

blogging

i'm having a hard time wanting to blog these days. i'm not sure why. it's not like my life is any LESS interesting than before. it's just life like usual. i hope i'm still noticing as much as i normally do. blogging is often my way of sharing all the things i notice about the world around me. i think i still notice - why don't i share? over the weekend i read a long article in the ny times by a woman who was a little too public, even for her taste, yet was compelled to be. it reminded me of the lessons i've taught lately in class. i keep asking the students, "why write?" only i usually ask, "why did this author write?" in almost all cases the authors felt compelled to write. it was a hunger or need they couldn't avoid. i can't say i've ever felt that way, but i also don't exactly consider myself a writer in the truest sense. the woman's article left me feeling the pain of too much self disclosure. that is one thing i feel i tend to be guilty of so i really try to watch myself. more importantly i try to be sure i dont' disclose too much of those around me. their privacy is even more important, but when it's intertwined with my own and i choose to share about myself i wonder at what point i've violated their rights. who knows. now this is useless rambling. let's just say i wish i had more to say. for now this will have to suffice.

Library

I love it! I try to go once a week. Today I picked up many things but this book may be the prize. I was just trying to let the "flow" guide me - open to any truth - and right at the end, in a section i've never visited before, big boom's "how to duck a suckah" spoke to me. I tried to put it back down but next thing I knew I was walking out with it. So far i've discovered some great truths in it!

Note: this post was started a couple weeks ago - somehow I never finished it until now. Oops.

walruses

it's been awhile since i blogged. i always wonder what that means. i do know i've been busy with "stuff" - the sort that isn't ever very blog worthy. last night for fhe we listened to a couple men in the ward who have served in the military. it was nice to be connected to the war on a personal level and remember that they are all just people out there. anyway, that's about as good as my blog material gets. but this morning i was reading in the ny times about walruses. cool animals! but this detail i came across is especially cool in my opinion:

Walruses want so much to be with other walruses that if there are no other walruses around, they will make do with the next available large object.

Bird!

I visited the tracy aviary today - so very nice! I played avian olympics and learned I flap as fast as a vulture and my wing span is that of a male osprey. This is a bird from argentina whose name starts with a "t" - really I can't remember his name but let's pretend this is a game and you have to name it! I got to enjoy the aviary courtesy of my sis-in-law who is in charge of their educational program - the olympics was her idea. My brother gave us (plewe came with me) a tour. He told us about the black headed swans who have had trouble having children this year - a blasted raccoon took their last egg. That same racoon is to blame for scaring the emu causing him to slice his neck open on the fence - a freak accident for sure. Marshall told us they have freezers full of frozen mice. He also showed us the twiggy next built by some green birds - they bit off all the branches ends in their cage to build it. The whole outing was exciting. Sorry this is the only decent photo I got. Plewe may blog better ones if we're lucky.

vocab word for the day

contrite \KON-tryt; kuhn-TRYT\, adjective:
1. Deeply affected with grief and regret for having done wrong; penitent; as, "a contrite sinner."2. Expressing or arising from contrition; as, "contrite words."
Contrite sinners forgiven, yes.-- Richard de Mille, My Secret Mother
Within days, a contrite Clarence Arthur was sending her roses and violets, even a bad poem.-- Paul Mariani, The Broken Tower
Often he'd look contrite and even apologize.-- Rafer Johnson with Philip Goldberg, The Best That I Can Be
Contrite derives from Latin conterere, "to rub away, to grind," hence "to obliterate, to abase," from con- + terere, "to rub, to rub away."

so i'm thinking this word has gospel applications - right? if we are to have a contrite heart and the root is "rub away" - it's like a total lack of any self pride.

humans vs. fruit flies

my reading students are doing a unit on the brain. we just read an article about a mouse that was genetically engineered to be smarter. the kids and i discussed for a bit if that was possible with humans - they weren't too quick to agree. anyway, this morning in the ny times i read an article about the science of making animals smarter and whether or not that was a good thing. one particular passage grabbed my attention because of a conversation i had last night with my home teacher newly turned eq pres. he said in his new position as eq pres people tell him things they never did before. he has heard stories about stupid people who seem to lack any sort of knowledge about the dating process and basic etiquette. the article made me wonder if humans really are all that smart - are we any smarter than a fruit fly?

"Research by Dr. Dukas and others has shown that insects deserve more respect. Dr. Dukas has found that the larvae of one of the all-time favorite lab animals, the fruit fly, Drosophila melanogaster, could learn to associate certain odors with food and other odors with predators.
In another set of experiments, Dr. Dukas discovered that young male flies wasted a lot of time trying to court unreceptive females. It takes time to learn the signs of a receptive fly."

pearls

don't mock me, but i wore pearls to church yesterday. i've decided i want it to be my new gimmick. i want to wear pearls to church every week if i can. i remember a woman who used to be in the ward that got married to one of the best guys ever (my home teacher - really he was the BEST) would always wear pearls. i'll never have her personality, nor her fashion sense (she was a bit stuck in the nineties i thought) but i can wear pearls. i don't know. call it an experiment.

i'm also trying to eat more carrots. they sometimes make my stomach go...hnnnghh... but maybe combined with certain other foods i'll enjoy the experience. i just miss the crunch factor.

Bumper sticker

I saw a funny one on my drive home tonight. I'd have taken a photo, but it was too dark, so i'll have to rely on words only. It said, "i am not a republican." does it make you laugh? It did me. Joy for some silly reason. Well I know someone who'd love it and so I share it here with the masses.

snow

may 1 and there's snow. normally i might be annoyed, but i'm going through an emotional funk of sorts and the snow made my morning. i went to the gym, as usual, only to find it unopened - i tell you - sometimes....! anyway, i went to liberty park instead and decided to go around once and call it good - despite the early hour and relative darkness. well once i got started i noticed it was snowing. i was determined to get some exercise in, though, so i pushed forward. i figured i'd get out of the cold faster if i did a bit of running. i believe i did more running this morning than i ever have before - i am not a runner, but i guess it's all about motivation. as i was going it felt really good to be out there alone (cars going down 7th east don't count) and enduring the snow and pushing myself to run a bit more. then as i walked into work this morning and the flakes were bigger and coming down gently i was reminded of a walk i took long ago back in college. i had night classes and one night on the way home the snow was coming down just like that - slow and gentle in big flakes. it felt like god patting me on the head comforting me after a long hard day of school. this morning, i guess it was a pat comforting me for the day ahead. nothing like a bit of a pat from god - morning or night - reassurance is always a wonderful thing.

Loathing

Numbers 21 - I learned today that it's best not to loathe that which god gives you.

east wind

last weekend we had some wind. well, i think we weren't the only ones. earlier i posted a bit of a letter from some guy who is in charge of the busses used by the army in iraq. i got another letter this morning (my sister gets them from his wife - same ward - and forwards them). apparently he had some wind. there's a good gospel lesson in it and since it's sunday - here i am sharing it with you all!

I've spent the week wondering at the quiet of this new place. Then, night before last, in the dead of night, there came a howling wind that rocked my hooch! I looked out the window and was astonished at the thick dust that blew through the camp, nearly blotting out my porch light completely. I have a new appreciation for the scriptural phrase, "the east wind." ("...if my people shall sow filthiness they shall reap the east wind, which bringeth immediate destruction.")

"In the Middle East this east wind is called a "kham-SEEN." The 'kh' sound is a hard 'H' that's forced through a narrowed throat, as if clearing the throat lightly. Besides the obvious destructive force of the wind itself, it brings thick dust that does three things worth thinking about, especially if you can see the symbolic nature of the phrase. First, it stings and blinds the eyes immediately. Second, the fine dust gets into your lungs and literally chokes you. Third, it darkens the sky and surrounds you with 'thick' darkness that you can feel.

"As morning came, the dust had abated, but the wind continued to rage throughout the day. By afternoon, as it began to subside, it had left destruction in its wake. It had strewn garbage all across the base, it had blown the plywood bus stops over and moved them around and broken some of them up, it had blown the Porta-Johns over and left human waste in big pools on the ground, it had even moved many of the heavy orange Jersey barriers from one spot to another! Some of the brave souls who had ventured out in the wind had opened their vehicle doors and had them wrenched from their grip, springing the hinges and making the doors unusable. Inside the closed buildings there was a layer of thick dust on everything. Going through one of these dust storms is an astonishing experience, though not nearly as astonishing as looking at the destruction after Hurricane Katrina."

Night on the town

For fun this evening I attended the utah symphony to hear carmina burana - oh heaven!!!! Best music ever, possibly. Then I took trax towards home with these ladies. Lena's fashion pain convinced me to insist on borrowing this homeless grocery cart. Trish was good enough to push. Lena only let us do it for about a block but i'm glad she did. It made for a party. Leann is the other happy partier in the photo. The rest of our symphony going group opted for red rock treats. Everyone has to follow their own drummer. Did I tell you the show wasawesome? It was.

For betsy

I tried to post last night but it didn't take - most of my posts are done by mobile - maybe mobile posting is broken. So i'll try again.
Read hebrews 10 & 11. Oh so good. Faith and patience. Rely on your testimony and keep up the hope!

I'm a winner!

Look what I got from my tax job! We had the celebration party tonight - I also got my bonus check. All together, my gross income for this job just barely covers the cost of my trip to dc I plan to take in june. My store was number 9 out of 27 stores in utah for most returns. Or some cool statistic like that. Our franchise was number 1 in the state. Our sister store was number 1 in the state barely beating st george. We're winners! And I think I made a connection for my next minimum wage job - I may get to be a cashier this summer at albertson's! That was one of my dream jobs since I was 6. A cashier, a teacher, a nurse, and a hot air balloonist. I think options 3 and 4 are off the list.

bias

as a lover of social studies i just ate up this article - like it was cheesecake! (or in my world ice cream.) see what you think. it comes courtesy of the ny times. one good paper.


April 17, 2008
Op-Ed Columnist
Divided They Fall
By NICHOLAS D. KRISTOF

If you’re a Democrat, your candidate won in Wednesday night’s presidential debate — that was obvious, and most neutral observers would recognize that. But the other candidate issued appalling distortions, and the news commentary afterward was shamefully biased.
So you’re madder than ever at the other candidate. You may even be more likely to vote for John McCain if your candidate loses.
That prediction is based on psychological research that helps to explain the recriminations between supporters of Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama — and the reasons why Senator McCain should be smiling as the Democratic campaign drags on.
To understand your feelings about Wednesday night’s debate, consider the Dartmouth-Princeton football game in 1951. That bitterly fought contest was the subject of a landmark study about how our biases shape our understanding of reality.
Psychologists showed a film clip of the football game to groups of students at each college and asked them to act as unbiased referees and note every instance of cheating. The results were striking. Each group, watching the same clip, was convinced that the other side had cheated worse — and this was not deliberate bias or just for show.
“Their eyes were taking in the same game, but their brains seemed to be processing the events in two distinct ways,” Farhad Manjoo writes in his terrific new book, “True Enough: Learning to Live in a Post-Fact Society.” It’s the best political book so far this year.
Mr. Manjoo cites a more recent study by Stanford University psychologists of students who either favored or opposed capital punishment. The students were shown the same two studies: one suggested that executions have a deterrent effect that reduces subsequent murders, and the other doubted that.
Whatever their stance, the students found the study that supported their position to be well-conducted and persuasive and the other one to be profoundly flawed.
“That led to a funny result,” Mr. Manjoo writes. “People in the study became polarized.”
A fair reading of the two studies might have led the students to question whether any strong conclusions could be drawn about deterrence, and thus to tone down their views on the death penalty. But the opposite happened. Students on each side accepted the evidence that conformed to their original views while rejecting the contrary evidence — and so afterward students on both sides were more passionate and confident than ever of their views.
That’s what we seem to be seeing in the Democratic primaries. Even though the policy differences between the two candidates are minimal, each camp is becoming increasingly aggravated at the other. A Washington Post poll published Wednesday found that more than one-third of Democrats say that they may not support their party’s nominee if it is not their own choice.
Another challenge is the biased way in which we gather information. We seek out information that reinforces our prejudices. One study presented listeners with static-filled recordings of speeches that they believed they were judging on persuasive power. Listeners could push a button to tweak the signal, reducing the static to make it easier to understand. When smokers heard a speech connecting tobacco with cancer, they didn’t try to improve the clarity to hear it more easily. But they pushed the button to get a clearer version of a speech saying that there was no link between smoking and cancer. Nonsmokers were the exact opposite.
This resistance to information that doesn’t mesh with our preconceived beliefs afflicts both liberals and conservatives, but a raft of studies shows that it is a particular problem with conservatives. For example, when voters receive mailings offering them free pamphlets on various political topics, liberals show some interest in getting conservative views. In contrast, conservatives seek only those pamphlets that echo their own views.
Likewise, liberal blogs overwhelmingly link to other liberal blogs or news sources. But with conservative blogs, the tendency is much more pronounced; it is almost a sealed universe.
The situation isn’t hopeless. Similar psychological processes govern our perceptions of race, yet we’ve made great progress in revising our views and reducing prejudices. The same is true of attitudes towards gays.
The only solutions I see are personal ones, to work out daily to build our mental muscles. Just as we force ourselves to nibble on greens and decline cheesecake, we should seek an information diet that includes a salad bar of information sources — with a special focus on unpalatable rubbish from fools. The worse it tastes, the better it may be for us.
If that’s why you’re reading this, congratulations! And thanks!

Doorway

There was something sad about this doorway to a big empty pit. It's the corner of 2100 s 1100 e where the blue cat cafe used to be. Now a dirt hole. Hopefully soon it will be something worth looking at besides this ruin. I visited this corner on Friday (last) when I was feeling a degree of ruin myself. I'd taken the day off to regroup. I believe in holidays - take them!

spiral jetty trip

when some friends recently brought up the topic of the jetty i jumped on the chance to lead the group, so yesterday, a group of about 10 of us headed north. the group had intentions of being larger, but considering our departure time was 8 am many found it convenient to back out at the last minute. their loss i say. maybe i'll lead another group up there in the future - i seem to love it every time i go. here are a few photos to document our adventure:

cindy ran into a guy she knew from provo days - he was carrying a golf club. odd.

the rocks were gorgeously covered in fine white salt debris. other rocks - further up the hill - had random lichen stuff growing on them. i loved all the colors and variations.

while walking to the end of the jetty i came across this treasure. it reminded me of mark's jacket from a new orleans trip (i'll have to blog that some time). it also reminded me of smithson's vision in making the jetty - the debris and decay of humanity. or something like that. i should really look it up and make an accurate statement here. or i can just trust you all to do your own googling.

in the middle of one of the loops people had made these miniature jetties. they look kind of worm like and sort of creeped me out. i think i'd rather they weren't there. luckily, when the water is a normal level they are covered.

here i am posing for my jetty portrait. the inner rings are behind me. you'd think no one was there (cindy did a good job framing it - thanks) but really besides our group there was the group cindy had a connection to and then a few other family types showed up at the end. plus on the drive home we must have passed at least 10 cars on their way out there. hooray for early morning trips!

this is my foot touching the final rock of the spiral. i believe you have to walk to the very end - otherwise what's the use of driving so stinking far and then only looking at the spiral's end.

on the way, we had fun playing with the salt foam. (some suggested raw sewage is dumped in the lake - but we have no verifiable evidence - again - someone feel free to do some googling.) i like how this blob looks like a large cloud in the background.


on the shore - when we first approached the jetty we discovered a mini one embedded in the sand. dainon is doing a find job as vanna.

i wanted to document the low level of water. these are my feet standing on the lake bed - next to the jetty. when i've been there before the water would have come up to my knees.

this is a photo from afar so you can see the largeness of it. that black thing down on the left, though, is not a car. i'm not sure what it is!
and one of the coolest things about this outing - was that i managed to get home in time to change into a dress, attend a surprise bday party and then attend a wedding reception. it was a full day of driving and friend bonding.

type test - it's all the rage

86 words

Speed test

making a buck on stupidity

i read an article in ny times yesterday about american idol vote casting. apparently the american public is bad at dialing and are causing havoc for a variety of people who have to deal with the mis-dials. american idol, in their altruistic way of solving the problem, has the host emphasize over and over during the show to be careful how you dial. anyway, i guess some utah company saw a chance to make some money but got voted against in court. i'm not sure if i'd agree with the judge.

"As Callers, ‘Idol’ Fans Often Lack Real Talent" By Edward Wyatt Published: April 12, 2008

In 2004 the Federal Trade Commission ordered a group of Utah telemarketers to pay $40,000 in restitution to “American Idol” viewers who had been charged for their mis-dials. The commission said that Telemarketing Inc., of Orem, Utah, bought up the rights to toll-free numbers that were similar to the Idol numbers in the hope that viewers would mis-dial.

When they did, a recording instructed callers to dial a 900 number to cast a vote. When they dialed that number, the callers would be charged for the call and then given the correct number to dial to vote for “Idol” contestants, which the commission ruled was a deceptive practice.

Banana snacks

This is an example of one of my latest greatest finds at the asian market near my house. Yummy honey drenched banana bites. Try them and you will see!

my conference report

just doing a bit of blog stealing. plewe posted this photo of our conference party - but i wanted to use it to comment on my weekend. can you tell which person above is not related?

saturday i was super productive in terms of walking. mostly i read ender's game but since i was already doing a lot of sitting for conference i made myself walk and read. so i went to the library before the first session and then to the asian market between sessions. i was proud of myself for managing to put it aside when the speakers were on.

sunday i spent the day with family. we drove up to the slc to go to the afternoon session with plewe. i learned an important lesson. don't leave your seat without a ticket. those volunteers take their job seriously and without proper ticket they won't let you back in - and i mean just into the auditorium after a quick trip to the facilities. i was sure the elderly man was joking when he said he wouldn't let me back in. luckily the sis in law had her ticket and was able to go fetch mine. there was a fire marshall sitting near by us and some public relations guy named phil brought me joy as he tried to show how hungry he was by patting his head and rubbing his stomach - this was before the session started. anyway - it was a good time. oh, and i enjoyed lots of talks. i was awake for bednar's when he reminded us that besides praying you have to take action. do something about what you're praying for. at least that's what i got out of it. i've been slow to take action lately. decisions are hard to make!

good love

here's an email from a friend who knows how to compliment:
oh then i'm not sure if i can go if you are not there. its like paris without eiffel tower.

hungry

you know how there are those days when you just get hungry all the time - not real hunger, but stress hunger? well today i just want to eat everything. unfortunately, the lunch i brought doesn't have a lot of yummy snacky kind of things to eat. i have curry - and an orange. i also have (had) a tupperware of collard greens. yep - that's what i ate in my stress-hunger drive. there's a can of beans in my desk drawer. if only i had a can opener handy.

another quote

i can't stop! this one plewe shared with me a few months ago - it came from a book that her friend shared with her. i love how they go round and round! oh - i believe it's from cs lewis, originally. he must have shared it with someone.

"Troubled soul, thou are not bound to feel but thou are bound to arise. God loves thee whether thou feelest or not. Thou canst not love when thou wilt, but thou art bound to fight the hatred in thee to the last. Try not to feel good when thou art not good, but cry to Him who is good. He changes not because thou changest. Nay, He has an especial tenderness of love toward thee for that thou art in the dark and hast no light, and His heart is glad when thou doest arise and say, "I will go to my Father." Fold the arms of they faith, and wait in the quietness until light goes up in thy darkness. For the arms of thy Faith I say, but not of thy Action: bethink thee of something that thou oughtest to do, and go to do it, if it be but the sweeping of a room, or the preparing of a meal, or a visit to a friend. Heed not thy feeling: do thy work."

wearing love

i just returned from the rest room. the only reason that matters is because while i was there i looked in the mirror and was reminded that i'm wearing pair of earrings a good friend gave me last year for my bday. it's like i'm wearing a bit of love. hard to not feel good when you're wearing love on your ears.

more quotes

call me unoriginal, but i really liked this bit i heard on npr this morning. it's from robert kennedy - from a speech he gave announcing the death of mlk. he's quoting a poet named aeschylus:

Even in our sleep, pain which cannot forgetfalls drop by drop upon the heart,until, in our own despair,against our will,comes wisdomthrough the awful grace of God.

atonement

okay, so i stole this. sort of. plewe found this article by dallin h. oaks online and shared it with me. i love it so much that i must share it publicly. as plewe described it, this article is one of the best expositions on the atonement and faith and repentance. read it! apply it! here's an excerpt of my favorite part for those who just like to skim blogs:

Why is it necessary for us to suffer on the way to repentance for serious transgressions? We tend to think of the results of repentance as simply cleansing us from sin, but that is an incomplete view. A person who sins is like a tree that bends easily in the wind. On a windy and rainy day, the tree bends so deeply against the ground that the leaves become soiled with mud, like sin. If we focus only on cleaning the leaves, the weakness in the tree that allowed it to bend and soil its leaves may remain. Similarly, a person who is merely sorry to be soiled by sin will sin again in the next high wind. The susceptibility to repetition continues until the tree has been strengthened.

When a person has gone through the process that results in what the scriptures call “a broken heart and a contrite spirit,” the Savior does more than cleanse that person from sin. He gives him or her new strength. That strengthening is essential for us to realize the purpose of the cleansing, which is to return to our Heavenly Father. To be admitted to His presence, we must be more than clean. We must also be changed from a morally weak person who has sinned into a strong person with the spiritual stature to dwell in the presence of God. We must, as the scripture says, become “a saint through the atonement of Christ the Lord” (Mosiah 3:19). This is what the scripture means in its explanation that a person who has repented of his or her sins will forsake them (see D&C 58:43). Forsaking sins is more than resolving not to repeat them. Forsaking involves a fundamental change in the individual.

patience

it's a hugely favorite topic of mine. i came across this quote today so i thought i'd share:
“In our approach to life, patience also helps us to realize that while we may be ready to move on, having had enough of a particular learning experience, our continuing presence is often a needed part of the learning environment of others.” – Neal A. Maxwell

niece stories

my nieces have a bunny that visits their front yard. this is a picture of the youngest trying to communicate with it - she makes sniffing sounds.

as for her older sister, well, it's best if i just copy paste the story about her directly. it's a bit inspiring. it is a good start to my day, at least. just for background - it's about an interaction she had with the babysitter:

At some point during the evening Lanelle tried to get Tamela to jump on one foot with her. Tamela told her that she is old (she’s not really that old; her only daughter is 18) and it is hard for her to do that sort of thing. Lanelle replied, “You should ask Heavenly Father to help you and he will help you do hard things.”

here she is in one of her favorite outfits, i like to think she takes after me:

stranger love

you know how it goes these days - everything online - strangers contacting you, somehow having fallen in love. or something. for your amusement i thought i'd post one of the latest protestations i've received. what's funny to me is that i recently read some 18th century sonnets with my students. i wonder if this is just a modern version of "to helene" - a rather funny sonnet in my opinion by some guy named ronsard. i think what really irked me is when this guy calls me a pillow. really, not a good word to call a woman. right up there with "couch" and "sturdy."

Hello
My name is micheal and i read ur profile so i liked it then i thougt u are the ligth that i can see and u are the pillow that i can lay some dougth some belive some la achive so it will be only u and me when u weak i will make u strong know where u belong i am not perfect but i promise i will not do u rong i will keep u away from harm my love is protected i rape u in my arms so u will never neglected i just make u aware of wat we will have is rare and the moment of the spare i will be the courage when u scared,loyal down for u as soon as i saw ur profile i wanted to be there cos i a can hold it down for u be around for u u are the qeen that is y i will treat u royal this is all for u cos i simple adore u.
I will love to read ur reply
Bye angel.

it is finished

i have officially completed my shakespeare class - i know, really i finished about a month ago, but today i got my transcripts with my final grade posted - a b+! i got an a- on the final - miracle! everyone celebrate!

Spoiled

This post is inspired my monica's blog - ain't life fun. Life is fun! And I am spoiled. I was just saying my evening prayers and reflecting on god's blessings. I realized (for the second time in a year) that god has surrounded me with the softest bounciest pillows ever. When life gets me down and I think i'm having an abraham moment I run into a big soft pillow. Today the pillow was aud and mind at the park with baby tabitha. Bounce! Thanks guys. Thank you to all the good pillows that you friends are!

More dona

I forgot - here's another photo documenting dona's bday. On the actual date some of the girl friends gathered for dinner at fat cats - yum to bread sticks!

Ed learns a lesson

For years i'd argue with ed about punctuality. Now that he's married he's often on time. Now that i'm older and still single i've lowered my standards a bit (just trying to blend). Tonight we gathered to celebrate dona's bday with dinner and u2 laser light show. It seems ed beat me to the restaurant. He discovered that one of the benefits of being early is that you get to sit in nice chairs. Lounging chairs no less!

quitting

do you ever want to quit your job? today i do. not because the kids are getting to me. because the beauracracy is getting to me. it's testing time and this year we're trying it online. i'm just stumped by the sheer impossibility it seems to organize my lessons/time around this unknown factor. the guy in charge of coordinating all this is a football coach. enough said. i can't listen to him - it causese me all kinds of pain. my only comfort is that if i did listen to him he wouldn't be making sense or would be making up stuff anyway. yep. i want to quit. i'm done. there are only 9 weeks left. anyone want to be a long term sub? i'm ready for summer.

easter reflections

first i want to thank all of you who shared uplifting thoughts by email or blog - it enriched my holiday weekend. and it needed enriching! i think this may have been one of my more significant easter weekends. my celebrations began by watching "king of kings" at the organ loft. i enjoyed the funny parts (silent films are just different) as well as the more spiritual reminders of christ's life. i liked seeing it portrayed through different eyes than mine and realizing that his life is for everyone, no matter their beliefs or interpretations. i liked the colorized part best - it reminded me that the resurrection morning truly is the most important point of this weekend - god promises us life. all kinds of life. christ brought us that life through the atonement and his resurrection.

then friday morning i attended an early temple session since it was my one and only day of spring break. the spirit was strong there and i felt completely relaxed as i had nothing more pressing waiting for me when it was over. i could just savor it. that afternoon i explored farmington bay where the cycle of life was evident in the swampy boggy noisy water and walk ways. birds and people were out in abundance soaking up some of god's great beautiful earth.

then saturday i went through a hard personal experience. what made it sweet was the peace i felt knowing that i could trust god and that even though i was sad i knew it was all for the best and would work out for the good of all. you know that bittersweet pain that you can't quite call pain because it feels right in some way? yep, that's the best way i know how to describe it. i felt peace knowing that i was doing the right thing.

sunday morning i attended music and the spoken word with a group of friends (see photo below). such beautiful music! and all of it about the death and the resurrected christ. i spent most of sunday leaking tears as memories and reflections on dad, plus saturday night's pain, kept flowing through my mind giving me new perspectives and just reminding me of love. i found myself thinking about god's will and god's plan for me quite a bit. i like that part of that plan includes the atonement.

anyway, it's hard for me be to be personal or spiritual in a blog - but i wanted to share something. and thank many of you for your "somethings." happy new year!

73rd annual spring ski & schleck

Okay - so it's only the third or fourth in my memory - but it's been great to celebrate spring these many years with so many good friends. We had a couple new participants this year. And stylin' ones at that. How happy it is to spend time in the great outdoors with great people. By the way, i'm trying to round up 23 friends interested in pitching in 100,000 dollars to share ownership of a brand new gorgeous cabin complete with a home theater! 2 weeks of the year it would be yours to use for free!

bird watching

i wish i could call myself a bird watcher. i'm more a bird see-er. i see them fly. i think - gee, i wonder what kind of bird that is, i wonder where it's going, i wonder when it's going to rest, i wonder if it ever feels lost, i wonder where it's friends and family are... things like that. today i had a very enjoyable afternoon seeing birds with my good friend monica. we drove out to some bird preserve - no it was a "management area." anyway, we had a yummy lunch and then took a good long walk alongside a bit marshy swampy wet part of the great salt lake. maybe it has its own name - but either way - it was pretty and there were lots of birds around. some old guy we ran into said they were canadian geese - even some big white ones he claimed were snow geese. monica and i disagreed - they seemed more pelican like - but since neither of us are real bird watchers there's really no telling what they were. either way, i recommend the spot - pretty nice - just south of the fair grounds i believe. don't go between september and march - old guy said that's hunting season - sounds dangerous. and part of the road is closed from march until august - something about breeding season. okay, so i don't know when the ideal time to go is. oh - he did say that you see bald eagles in february. we just missed them. i'm just bummed i failed to document my trip with the trusty cell phone camera.

Arctic

The home of lime squeezies! But tonight I had an above the rim choco-banana that wasn't above the rim enough. Still - it's a good place. Mark came. Lynn was supposed to but the eq people didn't get their job done fast enough. Which is unfortunate because mark - as usual - made me frustrated and I cried. We sure do have different conversation styles! But he's patient and forgiving. I am the lucky one.

overheard nerd conversation

the head computer tech guy and the ap calculus teacher were overheard in the faculty lounge today having the following conversation while buying coke:
"so what do you think is the largest cat?
"it's got to be the tiger."
not the funniest, or nerdiest, but still it seemed very odd to me.

speaking of odd things - today i found myself not bothering to secure the bathroom stall when i use the faculty restroom. i close the door (it stays in that position) but i don't bother with the latch thing - too hard to aim just write - plus it gets a bit stuck. i see no problem. i did wonder, though, when there was someone else in there if they noticed the lack of latching sound. hmm.

celebrating green

last night i attended one cool st patty's party. everyone dutifully wore green - wait - i think the guy next to me was in gray - well, you know how guys are. anyway, there was live entertainment. a professional musician played her piano and sang traditional irish songs for us. she also played a couple jigs on the fiddle. i learned the difference (maybe) between traditional irish music, american irish music, and american wannabe irish music. there was also lots of delicious food! what a great time.

benefits of yoga

last night in the shower i discovered one of the benefits of yoga. i don't know about you all - but my body had aged enough that i couldn't touch my hands behind my back - you know where one goes over the shoulder and the other comes up from below.... anyway, i could grab my hands - i could reach! i tried it the other way - i have NO recollection of ever being able to touch from that angle - you know how one side is weird and doesn't do what the other side does. anyway, they touched! they couldn't grab each other but they touched! i am officially more flexible!

once again - thank you cindy!

TV Reviews

it makes sense - i teach the high school.

wwww

speaking of the famed wwww tours - for the heck of it i feel like posting some photos from trips gone by. way by.
it seems all good trips need a feet photo. i believe this was the inaugural run for my car as chief transportation mode of wwww tours. it may have even been the one where i got my ticket - i learned the hard way that you don't pass a car by exceeding the speed limit.
this is another lava trip - we eventually grew out of our roots and moved on to more glamorous cities like st george. in this photo we're showing off our "tats."

clarification

the good roommate pointed out that some clarification may be necessary. wwww stands for women of the world whirl wind tour. see my trip to st george - that was the latest. in august we hit boston. good times all around!

nephew

i couldn't resist sharing this photo. it's my 2 year old nephew - or maybe only one. anyway, he climbed in this doll cradle at my mother's house and made himself comfortable. quite the photo to live down once he's all grown up i think.

recap

okay, so i'm home from my trip and i realized there may be a couple gaps in the story. i arrived in laramie on friday night and attended the obama rally. it was cool. then before turning in for the night i enjoyed some asphalt pie - it's been a long time since i enjoyed the deliciousness of wingers! saturday was filled with a trip to cheyenne to buy building supplies to make a dog kennel - i know - exciting. it was odd to me, though, to drive an hour to get to a big box store like home depot. saturday night i attended the brown and gold ball - a resurrection of an old tradition at university of wyoming. the ldssa decided to bring back the old glory a few years ago. i couldn't get over the flashback twilight zone feeling of the whole experience. i was surrounded by young college students dressed in a variety of "formal wear." the few couples at our table were fun to chat with - unsure of their majors but having a good time anyway. i saw many girls painfully dressed in bright colors that were either too tight or too short or too weird. of course, there were also the few that made everyone else jealous - even me - who was way too old to care. when the dancing began it was all country music, so we decided to head to the grocery and call it a night. sunday we forgot about daylight savings change so we overslept. not a big deal, but funny. church was great! lots of young marrieds, but smart sharp humble people - i loved all the talks and lessons. we got invited to dinner with by a family that was having missionaries over, so that was a nice treat. the evening ended with a pioneer trek fireside. i was a bit jealous - i kind of want to trek again! this time i'd make a bonnet and skirts instead of wearing the ugly di stuff i had. today i came home, but first i attended a class on land reclamation - the science of restoring natural habitats to areas that have been excessively modified by human use. it was pretty interesting. then a two hour drive back to denver, a two hour wait in the airport, and then an hour long flight home. full day! good adventures all around. oh, and my rental car got renamed "the black panther." i can't say i'm a fan of the chevy mini-suv and there were NO blizzards, but it was fun to have the xm radio and the feeling of driving a "new" car.

ugh - back to work tomorrow.

Chillin'

I'm just having a snack at the mc-d just north of denver. Not bad. I'm headed home now. I'll probably post more laramie stories later, but for now let's just say i'd rather not be headed home. Something about work and life back home just doesn't sound so exciting to me. I do like this outdoor table where I can hear and watch all the bigrigs come and go from the highway. Sort of like plane watching but different.

Obama

I'm a total loser - I forgot to take my cell phone/camera with me tonight. I attended the obama rally in laramie tonight. I know I have no photo to prove it but it's true. I was surprised by how much I enjoyed it. Yes there was the usual rhetoric, but as an english teacher I just focused on how fun it was to identify it. He wasn't as polished, though, as i've imagined him. He was good but there were pauses where he seemed to be struggling to remember what he wanted to say or how he wanted to say it. Either way, it felt good to see him and support him and think he'll be president. I did sign a huge "laramie loves michelle" sign. I wonder if she'll get it. Seeing it pass through the rows of the stadium reminded me of combined eq/rs meetings in the chapel.

The drive

Hooray for fancy radio in my car! I can listen to anything I want! But much like cable I found I just kept changing the channel. As you can see, there's snow up here. And wind. But that doesn't show up as well.

Black magic

That's what i've named my rental car. I've rented cars before (3 times I think) but this is the first time I did it alone. I was manhandled by judy, though. She forced me into getting the bigger car with 4 wheel drive. She insisited it's blizzard season and i'll need it. at least she gave me free extended hours. She also told me about her ramen and tuna stash in case I get stranded in denver with her. Really - a bossy woman. So i'm trying to enjoy the luxury of my fancy suv and not think about the waste of gas going on.

Denver temple

Here's the first leg of the lone wwww tour. It's a gorgeous day here - sunny and warm. I'm surprised by the chunks of snow on the fountain. Must be cold water.

The wait

Nothing like the line at the airport. This is my first trip to denver. Like plewe said, all the wwww tours have been good training - wahoo for single wwww tours.

It is finished

Shakespeare is done. And I didn't do as badly on the final as I thought I would. Instead of questions from ALL the plays like it said there would be I only had to deal with the last half of the course material. I was also very impressed with my ability to recognize many of the quotes I had to complete. Hooray!
as I left I saw a collection of paintings of the prophets that I remembered seeing in the halls of the harman building from back in the day when I temped there and attended church there. It was like running into an old friend. I took a photo of the new part - I think president hunter had just become the new prophet during my days there.

crazy

i'm seriously a bit crazy. i just told the byu testing people today that i will come in tonight at 7 and take the horrid shakespeare final. i have NO idea about anything. i better at least gather my books and maybe mark some passages that i was supposed to be familiar with or something. really i just think being done with it means more to me than doing well on it. call me a high school student. or something. did i ever tell you (the general you not really any of you in particular who are reading this) about the time i worked with mentally handicapped adults and realized how they are exactly like the rest of the world? when i taught 7th grade i came to the same conclusion about them. humans are the same. here on earth we look different on the outside and have different ages and stuff, but it seems we're really not at all different. we all suffer from laziness. for example, the one client i worked with would often wet her lazy boy. she would be rocking away in it, just enjoying herself. enjoying herself so much that she couldn't make herself get up and go to the bathroom. i found myself sitting on the couch sometimes, tired beyond belief watching pure lameness on tv and yet i was just too tired/lazy to get up and go to bed. it was like i was "wetting myself" for no good reason. i'll never forget that lesson. and yet, here i go to take a test i'm unprepared for and i just don't seem to care. hmm, my students will be taking a test next friday. i wonder how they'll do.

student sadness

okay, so this isn't really really sad news, but it did get me sort of down. one of my favorite (of ALL time) students just got checked out. i'm not sure where he's going, but i worry about him. he seemed to really be making progress here. i was even trying to get him some glasses so he could read without headaches. he was such a hard and faithful worker. really - a good example to me as well as his classmates.

more food goodness

dainon - this is for you. come on over! i have masaman curry cooking. (or however you spell that first word.) it's a red curry with coconut milk and a bunch of vegetables. normally i'd add chicken but i was too lazy to get any out and thaw it. the taste is the same. i just threw in extra asian eggplant for filler. it is all soooo delicious. hooray for the local asian market for hooking me up with the tasty ingredients.

baked indian pudding

basically it's corn pudding - but i like the romantic sound of "indian pudding." i got the recipe when i was in boston. the restaurant we visited had a brochure with a recipe. since i loved it in the restaurant i decided it was worth trying at home. trouble is i don't have a stone crock, nor do i want to bake anything for 6 hours. i managed to adapt the recipe for my sense of practicality. it's delicious. i'm happy to report i "baked" some today - it's in the fridge - ready to feed me this week. yum!